Babies, babies everwhere and not a spot to think...

Maybe I'm too judgemental. The size of a family is a personal decision, and as long as resources are available to take care of children appopriately, then it shouldn't be something I have a problem with.

But I do. Especially with families like The Duggars.

http://health.discovery.com/convergence/duggars/duggarkids.html

The Duggars, who have 17 children (the youngest is 9 months), have just announced on the Today Show that they are expecting their 18th child.

Now, come on.

I am sorry, but my personal belief on children is that you need to know why you're having them, and these people seem to just "accept" all the children that the Lord wants to give them. I find that irresponsible. God gave us the ability to control our family sizes by giving us the knowledge to learn our cycles and and determine our fertile times. Let's don't even get into the fact that he created doctors with knowledge to create a means to suspend fertility with a pill. But let's get back to just having as many kids as you "are given." God gave us the ability to have higher order thinking, and so WHY would we lower ourselves to the level of non-thinking animals and just have children as often as our bodies will allow us? We can control that so that we can best provide care for children we choose to have.

Want to have a big family? Great. But WHY? "Because God keeps giving me children" is a cop out. YOU have a say in the size of your family. Ben and I have decided that one child - maybe two - is the size family we want. I think the reasons for having children in the first place are somewhat selfish and self-serving - for the basic desire for children comes from putting your genetic code into the pool for future generations. I am not so full of myself that I think I need 18 mini-1/2-me's running around.

Let's be honest - When you get a family that size, you really are having your older children raise your younger children, and that's a lot of responsibility for someone who is not married and did not have a say in or make the choice to add to the family. You will not be able to foster strong relationships among your oldest and youngest children. Think about it - the Duggar's oldest son is 20, so he's out of the house at college (I'm assuming) and how much interaction and influence is he really going to have on his newest sibling due in January?

Mostly, I don't understand what - after 3 or even 5 children - one feels they are missing that the just HAVE to have more and more and more and more.

And let's say your family really isn't "complete" in your mind with five natural children. Ok. That's fair. But then why not adopt children who have no one who loves them or begin fostering children who need loving homes? What is the reason it must be your natural child? That just seems selfish to me.

I think people who have 18 kids are no more responsible than the girls who have babies just to have a baby daddy, because neither of them are making choices they have been blessed with the ability to make. They are simply sitting back and making God and Nature the fall guys, letting go of the control they have and I just think that is sad.

For some of you, this may touch a nerve. To you I say: Be mindful in your choices. It's an important lesson for your children...no matter how many you have.